Layover in Rio

I´m almost halfway through an eight hour layover in Rio. Madness is taking over and I´m putting together a small guide called...

"What to Do if You Ever Have an 8 Hour Layover in Rio"

Light race.

When you come in from the domestic arrivals area, go downstairs. Head towards international departures. You´ll see a very long, dull corridor. Do not take the moving sidewalks. Instead, simply walk while maintaining your gaze at the shiny tiled floor. The floor is so shiny, it appears as though the lights are racing, except none of them are really overtaking the next in line! To add a super cool effect, walk a little bit to the left or right -- it appears as though the lights are sort of veering. Again, none of them are attempting to overtake the next light in line. Weird.

Now, turn around and walk straight ahead. They go the other direction, too.


Food Game

Try to find a meal that isn´t´fried. It IS possible. Go to the counter and order. I bet you can´t do it without using your hands or saying your order in broken Portuguese or Spanish.

Soapstone

Peruse the shops. Did you know you can make anything out of soapstone? How about a petrified pirahna? Keychains, overpriced coffee, obscure Brazilian porno mags anyone?


Observation Window

Planes are towed. Planes take off. Families wave thinking their loved ones can actually see them from seat 49-F. Angola Air? Who in the hell has ever heard of Angola Air? (wait, Amy probably has)

Bathroom

Visit them all. Little old men sitting on stools live and work there. Sometimes they point to a urinal when you enter. I find this amusing. If you´re lucky, one of them may hand you paper towel. They don´t work for tips it seems, nevertheless, you´ll certainly piss them off if you start handing out paper towels yourself.

Try it. Try them all. You´ll see.