Nothing is too trivial to be considered on the agenda. Placing a stamp on an envelope becomes an event. I read. I cook. I make cards. I go workout. Take dogs for walks. Talk to mentally ill strangers. The key is to not let the sadness catch you -- if you do, you pay at the gym. I train until I hardly have the strength to get back home.

This afternoon, I walked into a body modification shop in seach of more pain. Maybe physical pain can substitute the emotional pain. I saw pictures of things that could be classified as torture. People burn themselves -- it's called sacrificial branding. I'm not at that point and I don't imagine I ever will be, but, next week, when I have a stretch off, I'm getting some kind of piercing that's going to hurt like hell.