*It's bad form to post an unfinished blog. It's even worse to post an unfinished blog riddled with misspellings. Sorry. Anyway, here is the lame story in it's entirety (I recommend just skipping it and re-reading an old one you really liked). *

By the way, there wasn't a tuk-tuk race. I just entertained a bunch of reserved friends from the U.K. all night. One of them, named Adam, looked like he could work at any Gresham, Oregon car stereo store. He was tall, muscular, with a 3 days of scruff. He also wore a baseball cap. I caught him on occasion trying to speak with an American accent. From that moment forward, I became his personal language tutor.

Adam soon became confident of his new language skills and would approach fellow bar goers to try it out. On one of these occasions, we were taking a piss and I saw him turn to the guy at the urinal next to him and say with a huge smile, "Hey dude! My name is Brad and I'm from Portland, Oregon!" He said it with such zeal that it amazed me.

His fellow countryman looked at him and replied, "Nice to meet you, Brad."

After finishing at the toilet, Adam went back to our table and told the story to all of his friends that he fooled an Englishman into thinking he was American.

I told you the story sucked. You should really be doing something more productive than reading my blog.